Ugh... I had insomnia last night, again... I took the two last pills, but they don't seem to work anymore... So I woke up to drink milk, and that probably did it... I also texted Ricardo at 1am, told him that I would just go away if we didn't meet more often (it's been two weeks) and I read his answer when I woke up, he said that he's sorry, he doesn't have time for dating... wow, what a great way to start a day.
I don't know what to do or what to think anymore. I really am completely lost. I really think I want a bf, someone to hug, kiss, cuddle, etc. I want someone to spend good time with. But all I get are people too busy with their lives or people I'm not interested in. Am I difficult? I'm not asking for Mr. Perfect, not at all, yet all those Mr. Good = Mr. Busy... wtf is wrong?
I always have to do everything. And it never works out. If I want a friend to talk to me, I have to talk to them first. I'm always the first one to text, the first one to chat, etc. Does it show how much people like me? Well sure it does. So why don't people like me? I have no idea. I'm definitely not perfect, but I also think I'm a great person.
Maybe I'm no fun... I mean, I don't really believe in fun anymore, so any activity has become quite boring for me. Well in fact, I don't like to go out anymore. I don't like to party, I don't like to spend time with my friends, etc. That's probably why people don't like me lol No wait, that isn't funny. :(
Well I suppose what I want is have a friend or boyfriend who I like and who likes me. For now, I have one: Khanh. Well, I'm glad, but I want more... Because I really feel lonely...
:(
But I'm so tired of looking for someone like that. Why don't they find me instead? Why can't I just relax a little bit?
I'm so tired of all the shit happening to me... :(
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